As with any journey in life, it’s important to know who you are traveling with, why they are traveling, and what they hope to accomplish. So I’ll get us started. My name is Kala, and this has been my journey thus far.
My upbringing was in a fairly traditional, conservative home. I’ve attended a Southern Baptist church for as long as I can possible remember. My parents loved me (still do!) and worked diligently to raise me knowing right from wrong. I had a lot of pictures in my head about how life was supposed to be. You know… go to college, meet a boy, get married, have babies, live happily ever after. This seemed par for the course for my family, too. Divorces, children out of wedlock, addictions. All of this stuff happened in the outside world, not in my family.
As I hit my early 20s, I started venturing out of the mold a little bit; and for a time, lived a lifestyle that wasn’t the most productive or God-honoring. But that’s a story for another day.
Fast-forward to year 27 in the life of Kala. I’d pseudo dated a few people here and there, but overall was re-thinking the whole married, having babies plan. I was feeling quite disconnected from my Savior who I said I committed my life to. Overall, I was just coasting along, not really progressing or growing in any area of my life.
At this point I met my soon-to-be husband- Brandon. A hybrid of a person like I’d never met. He struggled with life and was real, yet still said he loved Jesus. And to top it all off…..he was a worship pastor. He had lived a lot of life, made a lot of mistakes, and was still diligently serving Jesus. He scared and intrigued me all at the same time. Somewhere in between those two emotions, I fell in love with him as well. The fierceness in which he loved me back scared me more than anything, but there was safety in that scary. Within a year, we were married.
God knew that we needed each other. He knew that He still wanted to use me for His kingdom and work, and that this plateaued girl wasn’t equipped to do that work. He knew that I needed a partner in life to challenge me and catch me when I fall. Over the next couple of years, God really stretched me, introduced me to new things, showed me my character defects, and loved me enough to help me change them. Then He called me to do things for Him that wouldn’t be possible without that work deep in my soul.
He gave me several new roles in life, none of which I’ve felt the least bit prepared for.
First and foremost, I became a wife. My pastor once described marriage as taking two cats, tying them together by their tails, throwing them in a mailbox, and lighting a fire cracker in that same mailbox. I discovered that only with God’s help can I love my husband and care for my family well.
I am now the stepmom to two beautiful little girls- Ava and Hallie. It’s an amazing journey, and those girls are such a blessing. But it’s not been an easy journey. God has taught me to rely on Him in this role more than any other.
There have been other surprising roles I’ve landed in- minister’s wife, worship leader, addiction recovery leader, etc. In all of these things, I’m still learning that they are not an identity, nor is my success or failure in these areas. What is my identity then? I’m a saved, redeemed daughter of the King, perfect in His eyes because of what Jesus did for me and nothing else. I pray for the grace to live in this identity daily, and pray that each of you reading will find that same grace.
I am looking forward to walking together down this road- from everything to ‘super spiritual’ stuff down to how to best put together a crock pot meal. We aren’t alone in this journey, and I hope to be as transparent as possible about struggling and falling on grace because “I am confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion.”
Thanks for starting this! It already is a blessing to my life and I’m sure it will continue for me and others who are walking this messy journey!
Kala, this is beautiful. You are such an elegant writer. Your words can be felt flowing from your heart. We are so blessed that you are such a part of our family. I look forward to reading more of your writing as you bless both me and others.
Thank you Kala, for filling in the blanks for me. I wasn’t sure what was happening in your heart at the 22 + time but it’s a thrill to read this and grow along with you. Even at my age there is so much to learn and love about our God. Remember too! Yes, remember His great works! Love you dearly.
Sharon
I so needed this! What a blessing you are to me! I’m so thankful our paths crossed and that you are in my life. You’re such an inspiration in all your roles mother, wife, Christian and friend. I love you big! Thanks for sharing!